What the fuck is wrong with powerdrunk New Zealand authorities??
The just can't stop hassling us.
Here is our first meeting with NZ soil.
Sniff sniff, jump jump, wag the tail. Yes its a drug dog, and it likes me(Jorgen) and of course it does, he looks just like Brum. He just wanted to play! But try telling that to the customs officer!
She's like all important and the dog has marked you, do you know why?
I did, I said that it obviously liked me cause those dogs do!!
Apparently this was not correct according to her, apparently it was drugs on me or I had been doing drugs recently. I tried calmly to explain to her that I have never ever tried or been in contact with any drugs. Do you think she listen or do you think the took both me and Hilde into the customs control?
That's right, we got to spend 100 minutes answering freaking silly questions over and over, while an officer went thru all our dirty laundry and what not. All the while I was asking if he just couldn't get the dog over again or even the other dog I saw they had to check me out. Since this was clearly a big misunderstanding. It didn't work, and after all our bags where turned inside out they had to sadly admit it seemed, that there was no drugs and no traces of any, which I told them all along.
Just because Labradors like me, we got the criminal treatment for 100 min.
Welcome to NZ!!
Now lets skip forward some days. We are driving along in NZ wonderful nature.
Just one problem, the guy in front of us is driving insanely slow as soon as there's a curve on the road and speeds up alot when its flat. We all know the guy, very hard to pass and very annoying to be stuck behind.
And finally there is an opportunity, just have to wait for a few cars then its a clear strecth.
I floor it(its a toyota corolla), and slowly we start to overtake this annoying dude.
We are passed and of course we are above the speed limit, cause he was too after 300 m of a straight road. We are getting back into our lane when what comes around the corner?
Yup, it's the state trooper, with lightning speed trigger finger on the laser. In 2 sec he has clocked us at 125 in the 100 zone. Not even sure how that works, he is driving in 100 km/h toward us and we 125 toward him, and in 2 sec he has our exact speed? Sounds like an educated guess to me, which I didn't tell him. I tried to explain of course that to pass I had to speed up like that, you bet he listened.
It was the first time in 3 hours I had actually been above the speed limit, we where out for a Sunday drive, but to make a safe overtake I had to speed!
He gave us a nice little ticket, no warning, no I saw what happened and I understand. You are tourists and you should enjoy our country just don't do it again.
He had a mustache and just as powerhungry as the Norwegian "tronderbatalionen".
Your all thinking, isn't he done yet? No I'm not!
One more thing.
We went into Woolworth the other day, just to pick up a few things.
Pasta, chocolate, eggs and a bottle of 7$(26kr) white wine.
Behind the counter is a 18 year old girl, when you buy alcohol there is like a duty manager that has to come and punch in a code to confirm the customer can buy alcohol.
She is like a 150cm high lady in her mid 30's but looks like she is 45 ish.
She must be jealous, because apparently I am not old enough to buy alcohol, which means she believes I am 17! I try to explain I didn't bring my ID, which is outside in the car. Because in 1 month I'm turning 33 years old!(ok, I might not look like it, but unshaved as I was I don't look under 18 either).
So we tried to say that Hilde could buy it, she had her Bank ID with her, which yes isnt approved ID for alcohol, but it would sorta prove a point about our age.
This was not going smoothly with the duty manager, Hilde still looked to young.
And she said Passports and the Alcohol ID you can apply for over here is the legal ID.
We said fine, left the bottle on the counter and walked out.
But now out of spite, we had to prove her wrong. We took our passports and went back in.
We went all out and bought a 8$ bottle instead. Went to the counter, this time to a red hair acne boy.
Beep! Here comes the duty manager....
I take out my passport. She looks at it and says she needs to see Hildes as well!!!!
If I was buying for a 17 year old and got stopped the first time, would I bring her back in the second time? What if she was my 13 year old daughter? I couldn't buy wine in the store if I bring my daugther, sister and so on? What the fuck is up with the powerhungry authority stuff.
I'm a tourist trying to enjoy your freakin beautiful country but you are all ruining it for us!!
Thankfully we brought Hilde's passport. Handing it over.
And here we f... go again. Apparently we have foreign passports, WELL DUH!
And since we are foreigners there needs to be 2 people to control to see that the passports are real( personally I think she was to dumb to read a birth date).
We cant have the low level cashiers help her check the passports, no no. Peasants are equipt to such tasks, lets call up the store manager!
We have to wait for several minutes while he makes his way down. He looks hard and long, talks to his duty manager. Asks us a few questions and tells us why this is so important. And tries to explain why its an compliment that we look like we are 17 years old in their eyes.
I say using 15 min to buy a bottle of 7-8$ wine at the age of 33 isn't a compliment in any way.
Who in the world which isn't a duty manager or store manager at Woolworth would be so fucking stupid to commit the offence of passport fraud for a 7$ wine!!
Answer: NONE.
Rant over!
Next time we will talk about the beautiful NZ.
PS! What the f.. is up with "Wheel of fortune and With Stars in Their Eyes" being the most popular Tv programs here? No, it's not reruns, they still make them!!
